Body(YOU) Shame ? Why Its Important Not To Lose Sight Of What You Think Of Yourself.
"Being single makes room for a person to learn more about themselves," Spinelli explains. "There is more clarity around who you are and leaning into enjoying your own company." It can be easy to lose sight of what you really want, and who you truly are, when bouncing from relationship to relationship. Being single gives you the space to really know your desires.
Body(YOU) Shame – Why It’s Important Not To Lose Sight Of What You Think Of Yourself.
Each person's experience with cancer is different, and the feelings, emotions, and fears that you have are unique as well. The values you grew up with may affect how you think about and deal with cancer. Some people may feel they have to be strong and protect their friends and families. Others seek support from loved ones or other cancer survivors or turn to their faith to help them cope. Some find help from counselors and others outside the family, while others do not feel comfortable with this approach. Whatever you decide, it is important to do what's right for you and not compare yourself to others.
It is not unusual to see a disruption in relationships with others after a sexual assault. This is, in part, a result of the withdrawn behavior that frequently accompanies sadness and depression. The victim may also feel embarrassment and ashamed about what happened to them. However, the support of friends and family plays a vitally important role in the victim's recovery from the trauma of sexual assault.
Lysa:We're not going to shame you for any of these reactions, and we're especially not going to shame you if you yourself are struggling with pornography. And that can be both men and women. Men struggle with pornography, and the statistics are showing that it's on the rise for women to struggle with pornography. So we want to go there. I think there are five main questions that I want to tackle today. And the first question is, what's really going on here? What's really going on here with pornography? I know Jim, in our conversations about it, you've really helped me depersonalize this. In other words, as a woman, you've helped me see that there's some neurochemistry going on inside of the brain of the person who is struggling with pornography, which when you educated me on this, it really helped me to see that if I love someone and they're struggling with pornography, that it's not so much an issue that I should personalize, but rather I just need to be informed by it. So help us understand what's really going on here with pornography.
Jim:Well, thank you Lysa. The stats to me, if we move into statistics for a moment, they're important until they're kind of not important anymore. I always say from the Apollo program with NASA, Houston, we have a problem. And so with that, what's going on, especially during that pandemic, you remember the COVID pandemic? Remember that y'all? Is the stats through porn hub and other things were just astronomically high. Well yeah, we're sitting around. Boredom's the number one trigger I see with men in porn is, think about the brain just being beep, just nothing going on. And then boom, I hit a spike by thinking about going to porn and then actually going and looking as it hits that nucleus accumbens the pleasure center in the brain. So it really makes sense that it's about medicating and numbing out and escaping reality. And probably from Barna research and from some others, our friends at Covenant Eyes is for sure at least about 50% of evangelical men.
Joel:Well, and I would just say again, why is it a big deal? Because some women might be just wondering, and even after all of this, they're just wondering, is it even that big of a deal? And I would say, yes, it's a big deal. And here's why: Because when we participate in actions that are lust driven, what's actually happening is it's dehumanizing us. It is stripping us of our humanity. And God created us in order to be humans that reflect His goodness and His greatness and His kindness and to enjoy relationships in order and in safety. And so pornography is an active dehumanization. Now you ask this question, Lysa, it's like, where's the hope? Well the hope is one, and I don't mean to say this in a trite way, and I know it can come across this way, but I think it's important that I do say it, is that there is a man, His name is Jesus.
Joel:Yeah. I mean, it's just what conductors do, right? They're organizing, they're conducting, they're trying to move all the different pieces. But the problem is you can only conduct for so long without the other person seeing the benefit, the need, and their own desire and longing for the beautiful symphony that happens when the conductor brings all the pieces together. And so what you just said, Jim, is so important that at the end of the day you are not the conductor, but you are a part of the symphony. And God is the conductor, and you just have to be obedient for which you can be obedient for. I don't have articulate words for this, but I do have a couple verses. And I want to give one verse to the gal and one verse to the guy. And here's Romans 12:9 through 12. Here's the hope I think that you have and this is how you persevere.
Dr. Brown recently visited the University of Minnesota as a speaker for the Center for Spirituality and Healing's Wellbeing Series and shared some of the insights that come from her research. After twelve years studying vulnerability and shame, she has arrived at a surprising conclusion: what scares us is sometimes actually good for us, and if we can stomach sitting with it, vulnerability has the potential to transform itself into joy.